Locked in the trunk of a car

It's a not particularly well known fact that I am a claustrophobe and I am afraid of the dark. I don't know the formal latin phobia name for the latter. Yesterday was the only day in months that I had accidentally forgotten my cellular phone at home. I thought that was bad luck, but not a harbinger of things to come. As I was rushing out of the college to a meeting with one of my new professors at U-Vic, my elevator ride down was abruptly interrupted by a cacophony of silence and darkness - pitch black and very alone. In terror, I was subconsciuosly taken aback several steps and was met by the elevator wall. With my back still pressed to the wall, I slowly slid into a sitting position......and waited. Soon I could hear the voice of my boss calling down the shaft to see if anyone was trapped. I meekly responded to publicize my presence. He informed me that there had been a huge power outage and that help was on its way. That offered some, but very little, comfort and once again, in my black, sealed coffin, I waited. It should be noted that one cannot simply panic while in their place of employment. A certain degree of professionalism and decorum is required by college instructors and it took a lot of energy to suppress my natural reactions. I began outlining the rim of my coffee cup with my finger to focus my mind. I ended up creasing my finger with the pressure exerted through my terror. After what seemed like an eternity alone in the darkness, a funny thought crossed my mind. I figured that I had better finish my coffee because, depending on how long I would be trapped, this coffee cup may come in handy if I have to go pee. I found myself relieved to have it. Just then, the prying sound of some sort of tool jarred a crack of light into the opening of the door. A voice told me that I would be out in a minute and only a moment later the door was fully open and almost evenly balanced between the two floors. A head leaned into the lower opening and asked if I was okay. I said, "I will be in a minute," and pushed passed him. I jumped down onto the lower floor. I had been trapped for nearly thirty minutes; not the most fun half-hour of my life. Next time, I hope to be trapped with a 30-year-old bottle of scotch...and Ami. On second thought, next time, I'll take the stairs. It couldn't have happened to anybody else.
See you in hell,
Shakes.
P.S. If two guys are on an elevator and one guy farts, everybody knows who did it.