I scrawled these across a receipt one night working the overnight shift at an Esso station in 1993. That would have made me an arrogant 23-years-old. This post is sure to prompt some people to post a comment.
Hell's Angels and Alpha Beta Pi:
I have never had much respect for any fraternal group, whether it is Ivay League or dressed up white trash. Think for yourself, people! Mob-style violence and monetary sanctions to enforce coercive power can never be a substitute for true power. Greed motivates everything.
Baby-boomers:
The votes are in, and they screwed us (or at least their elected government did). My parents still believe that their achievement of equity and security is because they worked harder than I did. Supply-side economics plummeted us into unmaintanable government fiscal planning, but bought a lot of votes in the 60's and 70's. I will work twice as hard with no job security to achieve an emptied retirement fund.
Gay Rights:
Homophobia is out of fashion and should be. What is the problem here? Lighten up, Alberta. Do you really care? Give them what they want. Their demands are platitudes because gay marriages are no more proned to success than are heterosexual ones. Please, keep penises out of politics, no matter what your sexual orientation.
Bible-Thumpers:
You're kidding, right? Think for yourselves, people. It is a great set of incongruent, conflicting and temporally irrelevant parables. I've yet to meet a 'good' Christian that has taken a vow of poverty (quite the contrary). I've yet to meet a person that has taken a vow of poverty that isn't crazy. No one person could possibly tell any other person what the bible "really" means. Jesus was very cool, but I'll bet he DID inhale!
Lenny Kravitz:
Now that he is sporting his new retro-stylin', Jimmi Hendrix wannabe hairstyle, can we finally agree that he is a ROCK star? LSD drenched headband coming soon.
Religion:
It was the opiate of the masses . . . 1000 years ago! Now, we have television which is far more insulting. Any religion today becomes the mythology of tomorrow. Any attempt to identify or categorize a higher power is arrogant and impossible. Those too weak or frightened to face the horrors of reality turn to religion for comfort and answers to unanswerable questions which is tantamount to sticking your head in the sand. Otherwise, religion is nothing more than a systemic set of ethical rules as to which of our natural and heathenistic tendencies we accept and which we reject. Heaven and hell are myths that originated on earth because they are both here.
Sex:
More, please.
Guns:
Anyone stupid enough to argue in favour of guns deserves to be American. It is the only tool on the planet that has one use and one use only: killing. As Dennis Miller once said, "If we got all the mothers of the world together to vote, guns would be nothing but a sad, sad memory." And yes, I do realize the irony in that I just quoted an American.
Drugs:
They have the power to save your life, or to ruin it. Be careful! Yes, I mean you. And I mean be more careful than that.
Of course, that's just my opinion. I could be wrong. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. Aaaaaaa-ha-ha-ha.......
See you in hell,
Shakes.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
So I woke up in the middle of the night sat in bed, and began wondering if I was truly going to get any sleep before my alarm went off....which got me thinking....why do we say that an alarm clock goes off, when it actually goes on? And thus my hampster continued to run on the wheel in my head.....
Why do they put Braille dots on the key pads of the drive up ATM?
Why do they call them "apartments" when they are actually stuck together?
Why is it called toothpaste and not teethpaste.
If the pope uses the washroom, is it called a holy crap?
What is the opposite of opposite?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Why do toasters have a setting that burns the bread to a horrible crisp that no human being would eat?
If Fantasy Island granted wishes why wasn't Tattoo 6'6"?
Post a Comment