Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Adult Toothpaste

Back when Rory was about 5-years-old and I was still with my ex-wife, I remember an evening when I was in the living room with her and we were in the process of putting Rory to bed. He has always been fairly independent so after he had put on his pajamas, I sent him to the bathroom to brush his teeth. After about 15 minutes, my ex and I agreed that too much time had gone past...and it was far too quiet. Off I went to check on the boy. Now it is important to be aware that we had regularly provided him with the popular childhood amenities of the new millenium including designer toothpaste for children, often in bubble-gum flavours, and Disney-covered tubes. Rory had been indoctrinated from a young age not to touch the adult amenities in the bathroom, but he was typically curious. I found him standing in the doorway of the bathroom with a guilty and uncomfortable look on his face. He sheepishly looked up at me and said, "Daddy, I don't like this adult toothpaste" and he held up my tube of Ben-Gay. Ouch! I was still wiping tears of laughter away as I called the poison control hotline. The woman on the other end also burst into laughter and spluttered through giggles.
"No....no...he'll be fine. He'd have to eat like three full tubes of the stuff before it could be hazardous........but I bet his gums are tingly and warm....hahahahah." Then she hung up.

See you in hell,
Shakes.

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